Chemosabe

It would seem that I will be introduced to my new best friend tomorrow, chemo therapy, affectionately referred to from here on out as Chemosabe.  As with most friendships there will be ups and downs, days we are best friends and inseparable, followed by days filled with curse words and death wishes.  Since it is a forced friendship I have some apprehension about it.  Everyone knows it's easier to become friends naturally and on your own schedule than when your mom says you have to be friends with that person....

My treatment plan is 6 rounds, every 3 weeks.  At the end of 6 I stick to just one medicine for a year every 3 weeks. No one really knows how they are going to respond to the cocktail but I am thinking it'll be something like this;

Essentially a bit like Animal House!  I'm hoping that I will be one of the lucky ladies that Chemosabe treats kindly but only time will tell.  I would just ask that you don't text me numerous times asking how I am.  Please don't bypass me and ask my family members how I am either.  It's not going to be pretty but I will be fine.  The hardest part is the emotional component involved with this for not only me but my family as well.  For some people the random texts asking how they are might be helpful.  I am not that woman.  My battle is fought in my head and once I am finished processing and ready to tell the world I will.  You've probably noticed I don't update the blog daily yet.  It takes me a minute to process all the F'd up crap that I am dealing with.  One month ago I was a healthy, vibrant working mom that ran, lifted weights, attended everything for my kids, and so much more.  Today I am so far from that person it is comical.

When I am feeling up to it I will get on here and let you know.  If you want to send me a text that says, "hope you feel less like your insides are on fire and more like your kid woke up 5x last night..thinking of you." COOL!  Just please no message multiple times a day or phone calls numerous times because I can't pick up.  I love you, I am so grateful for the support, but sometimes I just need me time.  I've got this and I am blessed to be surrounded by people that are holding me up.  Three cheers that Chemosabe will kick cancer the F out of my body.