Long Hair DO Care

The other day while perusing Pinterest I came across this quote, "Invest in your hair, it is the crown you never take off."  I think unconsciously that is how I have always viewed my hair.  Those lucky few that have known me for decades know that I am not afraid to experiment with different hair length and styles.  When I was swimming and (forced) to run in college I chopped it all off.  I couldn't spend time doing my hair I needed to practice and study!  But those days are long gone and I have sorta fallen in love with having longer hair.  It is easier to do because my waves and volume needed little assistance at a longer length.  Now, looming around the corner is chemo, and my hair will be making a rapid exit. 

I have done a lot of research and consulted with numerous pink sisters that have traveled down this road with young kids over the past few weeks.  The consensus is kids handle their mom losing her hair in steps versus one big drastic chop.  My kids are most concerned about me losing my hair which is understandable as it is the most visible change to them.  With that in my mind I really want to try to make this next step in my treatment as painless as possible for the. 

Scotty and I talked with the kids about me cutting my hair.  We all looked online at pictures and decided what everyone liked.  Emery decided she wanted to cut and donate her hair with me so I made us an appointment. 

We made it a bit of a family affair with my mom, Brody and Reyna coming with us to cut Emery's.  My hairstylist, Jenny, and I have been together for over 5 years now and I adore her.

Emery cut almost 12 inches off.  It was officially her first big hair cut.  Up to this point we had only done trims so the hair cut really made her look like a big girl, which she is, but oh vey when did my baby grow up?!

Up next was me...I thought I was ready and I have said "it's just hair, who cares?!" about a hundred times but in that moment I was stupid sad.  I looked in that mirror and all I could think was, "this is it, the last time I will look in the mirror and look like me.  The last time I will look like the woman I have come to love staring back at me in the mirror."  There are some really irrational thoughts going through your mind AND IT IS JUST HAIR!  

Jenny and I cried a little bit together as she tied it in sections so I could donate it and then it was over. 

In the end I think I had around 11 inches to donate.  All in all Emmy and I are going to send enough hair to hopefully make a fabulous wig for someone with cancer.  There is some heartwarming tingles knowing that.  

Breast cancer is funny because it really strips you of all womanly feeling.  I have lost my breasts.  I will lose the hair on my head, probably eyebrows and eyelashes too, the medicine will most likely put me into early menopause...I don't feel like myself, I don't look like myself, and I am mentally challenged to remind myself that even though it doesn't look like it or feel like it I am still me.   I think I have said something like this before.  The harsh reality is that it is true and not something that people talk about because HELLO, it's cancer!  But I guess I wasn't prepared for this portion of the head game. 

As frustrating as it is the little things like Emmy deciding to chop off a chunk of her hair to donate with me are magical.  Then my sister(in-law but that is a total technicality) Lu surprised me on Sunday debuting her new hair that is chopped and shaved underneath in support of me.  She says she will go shorter every time I cut mine.   Lu is just crazy and I can't believe that she did this!  Here I am bellyaching about cutting mine and she goes and buzzes hers!  I am a very lucky girl to have the support that I do and I am so, so, so grateful for my family they are one in a million, no trillion.